Maybe you separated from your wife yesterday. Or perhaps you and your husband have been living in separate apartments for the past six months. In either case, when you think about the divorce process ahead, you get a little overwhelmed.
The situation seems so intense, so long, and so potentially fraught with complications. Obviously, part of you wants it to be “over” as soon as possible. At the same time, you know that you need to fight for your rights, for your fair share of the marital estate, for the custody of your children and for their future. But the prospect of having to “do battle” with someone you once loved dearly sounds less than appealing. So what can you do? Given that your life is in a state of flux — and your finances and personal relationships may also be in a state of flux — how can you compartmentalize your emotions and, as the self-help gurus might say, “live your life as if each day was your last”?
One method that’s actually been validated by surprisingly diverse research involves taking time to appreciate small victories.
Savor things that go well, when they go well. For instance, let’s say you just made it through a day in court without losing control of your emotions in public. That might not seem like a “victory.” But the situation could have turned out much worse. So appreciate your discipline: doing so can lead to a virtuous cycle. In other words, you will feel better about yourself and about the divorce, which will then allow you to take more decisive and strategic actions, which will in turn help you feel better about the process, and so forth.
Call the Toussaint Law Firm PC today for a free and confidential consultation about how to handle your divorce.