As a member of the U.S. military deployed overseas — or as the spouse of a military officer who’s been inaccessible for months or years — you’re feeling lonely and disillusioned.
On the one hand, you remember the good times – the positive memories of your relationship. On the other hand, the lengthy, irregular separation has taken its toll. You may be questioning whether you want to stay in the marriage. Perhaps you’ve even arrived at the point where you’re seeking legal help with a military divorce or separation. As you work through these difficult life decisions, you might find it useful to put your relationship struggles in context.
Human beings are (generally) biologically programmed to be monogamous. That is, we like to stick with one partner for life. But, evolutionarily speaking, we are also opportunistic. In plainer language: we are also programmed to “love the one you’re with.” So when couples must stay apart for extended periods of time — particularly over irregular, unpredictable intervals — many people feel serious pressure to abandon the relationship.
Military couples often go through extreme family transitions during separation. It’s one thing to be involved in a long distance relationship, if you’re dating in your 50s, and you have few, if any, pressing family or financial obligations. It’s another thing to maintain a long distance relationship, if you’re raising young children or trying to get your career off the ground. The stress of the family transition can combine with the stress of the long distance element to make the relationship untenable.
We’ll talk more about the unique stresses and facets of military divorces in upcoming blog posts, so please check those out. In the meantime, if you need help with your military separation or divorce, please call the Toussaint Law Firm, PC today for a free consultation.