Will getting divorce make you happier? How do you know?
Believe it or not, human beings are surprisingly bad at being able to predict how certain decisions will make them feel. As authors and scholars like Daniel Kahneman and Daniel Gilbert outlined in their popular science books, we are just intuitively bad at projecting our emotional futures and, similarly, remembering our emotional pasts.
Right now, for instance, when you think about getting divorce, you might imagine “being alone and/or being free.” You’re likely to base your emotional predictions on your current feeling state. In actuality, however, three or four years after you’ve been divorced, you’re going to have a very different internal reference point. What feels “true” to you now won’t necessarily feel true to you two or three years from now, after the divorce.
So how can you make a better decision – one that will be in line with what you hope to create for yourself in the future?
One smart way is to talk with other women (or men) who have already gone through the process and see how they are feeling and coping. For instance, if you are a Southern woman with three small kids who’s considering getting divorced from a man who has a substance abuse problem, find a woman who fits your exact demographic — who has gone through the exact same kind of divorce you’re contemplating — and talk to her about her experience. You’ll get a good gauge of how you’re likely to feel in the future.
In addition, you also probably want to learn more about your potential options in divorce. Call the Toussaint Law Firm, PC immediately to discuss your needs.