Should you get divorced or not?
As you read those words, no doubt some part of you clenches up: it’s a stressful question, since it’s such a decisive one. Once you go down that road, you can’t (easily) undo things. This isn’t to say that reconciliation after separation is impossible. But if your spouse doesn’t even know that you’re unhappy — and then you file for divorce or ask for a separation — repairing that rupture becomes complicated and emotional.
But how do you know what decision to make?
Most people use cerebral tools, like “pro and con” lists, to make the “correct” decision. Obviously, you need to engage your brain and think through the consequences (both of staying and of leaving) analytically. However, your intuition is also a powerful aid. If you harness your intuition, you might be able to make a better/faster decision.
Here is a great strategy that can help you get a “pure” reading of your intuition. On an index card, write the words “yes” and “no.” Then put that index card on the fridge with a magnet. Then walk away. The next time you’re in the kitchen — which could be hours or even days later (if you’re living on take-out) — and you see the index card, impulsively and without thinking, grab a pen and circle either “yes” or “no.” Circle “yes” if you want to get divorced and “no” if you don’t want to get divorced. That’s your intuition speaking.
If you want to speak with an attorney to understand your rights and obligations in divorce, email or call the Toussaint Law Firm, PC right now to set up a time to speak with us in confidence.